Thursday, April 13, 2006
Silly me:I just read it.This is for you,yes you.
Hay nakunakunaku,forgiveness for what???
If you believe what you did was best for you,then am cool with that.
It is me who should ask for your forgiveness,for wasting much of your time.Kita mo na nagpagod ka pa gumawa ng LJ entry,nakunakunaku talaga.
Now really,you dont have to mind me,you know am just an overly dramatic prick.
You do good now.
i loathed you @
2:59 PM
Her Birthday,My Bash
I went out last night to go to my sort-of-friend-ish birthday party. It was okay;mild booze,tamang chill,surrounded by so many rockstars. Make',former vocals of Humble Sauce, was so cool,his stories can be included in Maalaala Mo Kaya,kidding,but his dedication to his music was something to be looked up to. Plus,he promised me free tickets in an upcoming big event which inlcudes five foreign bands,and we just met that day,how sweet is that.Joe of Too Late the Hero was there,too,well he's mau's ex,that's to be expected. Ferd's of Holding On and Mike of Frustrated Valentine where there,too.But enough of the hooligan,this is no happy blog post.
My main concern is the birthday girl. Truth be told I went there for p _ _ _ y,for I see her as a sexual object. And I would bet my life I was not the only who looked at her that way at the party. Well everyone knew she's easily wasted,throw her a few drinks,voila,a major headache for a manong like me. At first it was okay,I was one of the first people at the party,flow of booze was mild,and I sat beside her for I knew no one there.Hey I didnt do anything to her,am not a full pledged perv.Then more people came and she got wasted. I was half pissed when I saw her make out with her cousin but I just kept mum,as if I have the right to butt in their business. I was even thinkin,okay maybe I'll have a go at her later.
And things got worse,a whole lot.Now she was about to make out with this girl, a just-for-kicks stint they do. Okay the first 3 second kiss was like wow.Then the guys asked for another one,but this time they all whipped out their camera phones,so they could have it recorded.And this time I was like,fuck y'all,how bout not treating her like a slut?But likewise,I kept mum,and the girls obliged,from a 5 sec to another 3 sec to another 5 sec then I lost count.Seeing something like that,knowing myself,I would probably have wood,hell they were both hot and they were only uhm together they were 34 years old,do the math.But I didnt have one,which was weird,I was even scolding Capt. Winky,"you're dead when we get home".I was there for p _ _ _ y,but seeing the way she was treated, I realized a little respect would be good,and that I even have an ounce of repsect for a girl I see as a sexual object.I was pissed and surprised at meself at the same time. Wow,maybe I am nice.
Well being nice really sucked,you get no p _ _ _ y you even have to help clean the mess when all of them are wasted and fucked up. And rock stars are weak drinkers,haha.
While I was typing this crap we were texting.She asked me how i was and I told her am half pissed. Oh well me dear I hope you'll be able to read this. Dont think I pitty you because of what happened,I even respect you more than ever. And sorry I failed you because you thought I would be the last one to go,but you were already in good company,and you wouldnt mind me leaving.Dont worry the deal is still on,I would take you out of your rock and roll lifestyle,even for a day.But I guess its better I dont,this is my farewell,you'll never hear from me again,swear.
i loathed you @
2:28 PM
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
VH1: Videos for Goons
Since it's summer, my insomnia is back and I find myself flicking thru channels till 3 or 4 am.And last night,I came across MTV,and VH1 Video collections are up. I missed watching this show,the videos are so fuckin amazing. And since Im stuck in the 90's,the classic vidoes gave me a feel-good mood,but that was only in the beginning.Why?Here's the video line up:
One Week by Barenaked Ladies
A wonderfull feel good song,cause as the song goes,Im a man who can laugh in a funeral.And I have a history of losing my shirt,haha.
The Scientist by Coldplay
This is the only song that I liked from coldplay.
"im going back to the start"
Bitter Sweet Symphony by The Verve
Ansaya ko na nyan,parting party ako sa ganda ng naririnig ko.At habang ako ay pumaparty naisip kong hanapin ang aming Baygon.
Brick by Ben Folds Five
"She's a brick and Im drowning slowly,off the coast and Im headed nowhere."
At dahil sa kantang yan,naisip ko ngang lunurin ang aking sarili,sa Baygon na nahanap ko sa wakas.
Slide by Goo goo Dolls
"Could you whisper in my ear,the things you want to feel,I'll give you anything to keep it coming."
"I wanna wake up where you are."
Akalain mong immune din ako sa Baygon,aba'y continue na lang ako sa drama ko.
Shimmer by Fuel
Not all that shimmers is gold,ang glitters nagshishimmer din.
Flood by Jars of Clay
Ito naglalakbay na ang isipan ko nito,kung bubugahan ko nanaman ba ng Baygon ang kinahihigaan ko dahil sa dami ng lamok,teka ubos na ang Baygon.
When You're Gone by The Cranberries
"And I'll miss you when you're gone"
Hayup ka Dolores.
Push by Matchbox 20
At ito na ang huling video,kaya pinush ko ang remote para ilipat ang channel upang makapanood ng wholesome pure entertainment na naidudulot ng FTv.
Malungkot ka na nga amoy Baygon pa ang hininga mo.
i loathed you @
8:13 AM
Sunday, April 09, 2006
My Eyes!!!!
I never thought Id ever see a movie with so much sex activity.It wasnt even a porn film. The Span films are just like cartoons compared to this movie.
Okay the title of the movie is "Lie with Me". Hell, para akong narape,ang tindi nung girl. A lil eroded up there but overall,I give her an A-.
The story could have been great,but the subtitles were freaking funny,I couldnt understand em at all. Oh heck,there was so much screwing going on your ears wouldnt function,only your eyes and your head will.
And the funniest thing about the movie is the leading man. Not only did he had an ice pick-ish chin,he was a peewee,you know what i mean,hhahahah.I was more suitable for that role,even if I fold mine in half,fold my hanky,hanky,right.
Hey,I get it.
i loathed you @
3:16 AM
Friday, April 07, 2006
Another Emo Acoustic Interlude
I guess Im never really good at getting over things. Damn, not this phase again,these are the shittiest days of my life,again.
"When a guy is rejected of his love,the man in him dies." This was a quote in a movie titled "Win a Date with Todd ???" ahh i dont know, basta it stars Eric Foreman, and mas mataba na sya sa movie na to.
Damn, the man inside seems to endure a lot, he would die not just once then. Of course there is always someone who could bring that man back to life, not the hot nurse you pervs, another damsel who could either build you or break you.
But what if there was none, let's say no one compares to the one who snapped you like a dead stick, okay this may sound like an obsessed-psycho-ish case, but trust me its not,im a psycho but not obsessed,well not that much,tihee.
And a proud man said,"A man would always find something better,he would never settle for anything less than what he had in the past."When you grow older young man,you'll learn.
I am neither mad nor sad, well a bit sad, and I expected the worst to happen,but why do i still feel like a half baked shit,maybe because I am a proud dickhead.
And the last year of my teeny bopper days is finally arriving. Nineteen, a year more, am an old goat. And relationships at this stage are crucial,well for some guys. I asked my most trusted friends, "Do you see your current girlfriends as your future wife?",they all answered yes,and I was the only single guy,and I was like shit man,y'all are kidding.I never saw not even one of my exes as my future wife. And my friends are already thinking of their future??!! Do I or do they have the problem?
And my kanang kamay in the barkada,(this guy knows me very well,we even think the same way),said the wisest thing I've ever heard. "Ang problema kasi sayo balong,hindi mo alam kung sinong seseryosohin mo. Ito na yung time na naghahanap tayo ng possible wife." Oh come on man, if I get this girl pregnant we'll definitely end up together, but will split up later on,haha.I guess he's right,I did fool around a lot back then, too proud of meself,too sure I will put the eggs in the basket.Then I learned that I was wrong, the hard way.And when I was trying to start all over again,starting to change meself, the worst came,and now am less than a dead stick,less than nothing to be exact.I guess lessons come with punishments, and they were fuckin harsh.
And now am the total loser, where are the teasers,where are the take home biatches,where are the holes-for-sure,where are the pwede-na-chicks,where are the reserves?Uhm, you set them all away,you were trying to be mister goody goody remember?Damn it sucks to be nice, and this friend tells me I am a good man,no Im not,I only go for what benifits me,ahh crap.
I have no regrets whatsoever, even though more than two people told me what was going to happen to me,and what I was doing would eventually end up in the dumpster.I guess am right,not only was I stubborn,I was also stupid,so what,I was happy,used to be happy..
Though I have no regrets,these are my if only's:
If only you didnt go back to that hall,I didnt notice you the first time,but the next time I saw you,hwaw.
If only she was not that sweet and kind,I would have kept my focus on you, wala eh,as Mundo always reminded me,the easy road often leads to a cliff,ayun nalaglag ako.
If only you ended up with that guy,then I dont have to fall for you again,I would be very happy if you were with him.
If only I was not too hopefull,I wouldnt have wasted your time.
If only I was single that time,then I would have told you everything,how much I felt for you and I would have started courting you,even my girl friend knew who you were,hell I always mention your name in between our conversations.
If only there was no brawl,then you could have seen us perform,and hindi sana nabato si hondy,tihee.
If only you didnt tell me I was "officially" the sweetest and nicest person you know,then I wouldnt be so damn happy na kahit mawasak yung kotse ko,sumabog yung Ardz at mamatay lahat ng mga kabanda ko,basta at the end of the night we are at your gate and I am smiling silly bidding you my goodnights,thank yous and good byes.
If only my quotes were more effective,and you were less smarter, or you were blind,deaf and mute,just kidding!
If only I didnt knew you were in that class, then my eyes wouldnt force my gall bladder to pee every 30 min just to have 2 second glimpses of insanity.
If only I didnt ask for the truth,then I would not have to choose between lose-lose choices.And am still be smiling silly everytime up to now.
If only you knew I would never choose to be just your friend like the others did, then you would have given me better choices. Cguro papipiliin mo na lang ako between jumping off the MMDA foot bridge in commonwealth ave during the rush hours or kakain na lang ako ng 5 coils ng katol within 20 sec,and the time starts now buster!Hihihihi,kidding,am kidding.
If only you are not a haven of happiness,that my soul would sing if you pass by and earth is hell if you were not on it.
If only you were just half amazing, that I know will never be.
If only I was more than half amazing,eh hindi talaga eh.
If only liposuction was cheap.....
Hindi sana mayaman si Vicky Belo.
i loathed you @
3:12 PM